Release date: August 22, 2012 

A comedy that never takes its foot off the gas.

While I was sitting in the theater, I kept thinking I was on the first season of Punk’d, Because I kept hoping this film was just an elaborate prank. I was wrong.

Hit and Run is an “action” romantic “comedy” starring Dax Shepard, Kristen Bell, Kristin Chenoweth, Tom “Mr Rosanne Barr” Arnold and Bradley Cooper. It was written, partially directed and produced by Shepard, who in turn hired all his friends for cheap wages. And believe you me, the wages weren’t the only on cheap things about Hit and Run.

Hit and Miss (hahaha I did it.) follows Yul Perrkins (Shepard) and his girlfriend (Bell) of one year as they face the usual trials and tribulations any young couple faces: murderous revenge from Yul’s secret past, and a gang of inbred-southerners as friends. This film has slow reveals that are evident from the beginning and some useless B and C plots to flesh out the 100 minutes stolen from everyone who see this flick.

WHAT WORKED:

– Bradley Cooper. He took a really dumb role, with little character motivation and a crappy wigger style, and made it the funniest part of the film. And he isn’t there much.

– The trailer. Watch that if you want all the funny. I’m serious.

WHAT DIDN’T WORK:

– The music and score. By the beard of Zeus, when you have a romantic scene or a serious or even a sad scene, DON’T use springy “boing boing” music. It confuses the audience. Already no one can take Dax Shepard seriously with his “Keanu Reeves Homeless Man” Beard, you don’t need to add the 2012 equivalent to the Seinfeld “pop.”

– Tom Arnold and Kristin Chenoweth’s plot lines. You could have trimmed these scenes out completely and it wouldn’t have changed much in the other character’s motivations AND I would have been home in time for a Gilmore Girls rerun.

– The relationship between Shepard and Bell. I’m not complaining about their on camera chemistry as it was alright. But what I am complaining about is their history. At one point in the car Dax’s character says things about other people that greatly upsets Bell’s character. After a full year of dating, how does she not already know he’s vulgar like that? Especially if she sees him hanging around the simpleton of Tom Arnold. And why does he ALWAYS call her Buddy!?

THE LOWDOWN:

It’s 100 minutes long. Take that whichever way you want. This film is full of filler scenes that do nothing for plot, pacing or laughs. A sub-par performance for Bell and Shepard. It’s unfortunate that Cooper was stuck in his position. But then again in 6 months no one will care for or remember this flick.

Hit and Run gets The Toilet.