The Watch

Release date: July 27, 2012 The Watch

Got Protection?

This flick has about as much focus as a kid with ADHD in a room full of colours and boobs. The Watch, previously titled Neighbourhood Watch is your typical sci-fi comedy filled with laughs, bangs and “WTF’s!?”

Written by such comedic genii (writer’s note: That’s right- genii. Plural of genius) Seth Rogan, Evan Goldberg and *ahem* Jared Stern, The Watch is directed by Akiva Schaffer who’s got a lot of SNL cred to his name. Starring in this thang is Ben “Just For Men hair colouring” Stiller, Vince Vaughn, Jonah “Eating Healthier” Hill, Richard “I got nothing, sorry” Ayoade, Rosemarie “Multiple personalities that should still be on air” DeWitt and Will “Give me 10 lines and I’ll win an Oscar” Forte.

The Watch is about control freak and all-round good guy Evan Trautwig (Stiller) starting a neighbourhood watch with a band of misfits after a security guard is murdered at the local Costco. (SHAMELESS PRODUCT PLACEMENT ALERT) Of which Evan is a manager. What follows is a fuster-cluck of Sci-fi and hilarity!


– The music. Hot dizamn! This film has got some rocking tunes that just put you in a happy mood. They don’t shy about it. This movie is a good time, and I’d like for it to DJ my next party. Sorry Uncle Vernon.

– The jokes. They might not be spaced out well throughout, but hot damn when they land, they hit right. I had a solidly sore knee from the slapping I gave it. There have been too many times where a comedy is just a good movie, that keeps me entertained but doesn’t have be laughing. I’m looking at you Superbad.

– The special effects. Not much to say other than they must have blown their budget there. Top notch.


– Stiller. I’m sorry buddy. But he just felt so forced in this one. After seeing his heartfelt performance in Tower Heist, I felt he phoned this one in.

– Vaughn. He didn’t phone this one in. I just feel like he plays the same character in every film. Now this might not be his fault, but how many times can you play the sleaze-ball with a heart of gold?

– The pacing. This is kind of related to the jokes. This film is a good time, But like any party it falls a little stale somewhere near the 3/4 mark. The reveal is obvious, but it plays like they think the audience is stupid, when they should have cut out 10 minutes, or added seven minutes of “picture party” fun.

– The foley work. Holy crap. Useless sound effects for random objects. I KNOW IT’S A CELL PHONE. I CAN SEE IT. Even some of the walking sounds were off. Maybe they hired a crappy foley artist when they realized they had blown their budget on the visual effects.


– This is a good time. No doubt about it. You have a crew of heavyweight comedic actors, a premise that’s been done before with an extraterrestrial spice that makes it feel new and shiny. It’s a funny flick until it’s lul about 70 minutes in, But after that it’s jam-packed with action. It’s got laughs. It’s got great music. It’s even got boobies. Go see this flick as it will rock your socks.

The Watch is So Damn Stupid, It’s Awesome.

3 responses to “The Watch”

  1. Nice post, just found your blog on my travels around the Internet. Definitely will come back.

  2. […] – Vince Vaughn. I can’t take it anymore. The fast talking, bullsh!tting loveable jerk from Old School and Wedding Crashers is dead to me. Now he just rambles BS that doesn’t make sense and gets people to agree only to make him shut up. It’s as though he’s trying to be Chili Palmer from Get Shorty and Be Cool; only he’s failing at it big time. Please see what I wrote in my review for The Watch. […]

  3. […] just a bunch of friends messing around and having fun while cameras are rolling. I’ll mention The Watch in the sense that it’s funny people just being […]

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

Blog at

%d bloggers like this: