Release date: July 3, 2012 

Straight up: STOP comparing it to the comics, cartoons and even the Sam Raimi films. Yes this is a reboot of a franchise that is BARELY 10 years old. However, I feel that with the colosal failure of Spiderman 3, we can all agree a change of direction was deeply needed.

Now I’ve heard a million theories about how Sony/Columbia could have handled this better, by “James Bonding” it. They could have used the new cast and story and avoided the origin story and let the fans decide personally if it were a reboot or simply a sequel with a new rodeo. But that’s NOT what they did. You’ll still pay to see this flick, so stop f–kin’ around and accept this fact.

Now on to business.

I didn’t see this one in 3D.

Wow. The Amazing Spiderman is all over your junk like that girl who just got dumped is all over that plate of nachos and triple chocolate ice cream. This shindig is directed by Marc Webb and stars Andrew “I have a hard time talking to pretty ladies and authority figures” Garfield, Emma “You know what I mean” Stone, Rhys Ifans, Denis “Just doin’ my job” Leary, Martin “Mr President” Sheen and Sally Field. With a cast this diverse you can expect some solid acting. But with the script they were given, you got the best they could do: average.

Like I said this is a 100% prime meat reboot. Now the original Raimi film Spiderman premiered on May 3, 2002. That’s barely a decade ago. With the last film headed by Raimi being in 2007, all that Tobey Maguire stuff is still pretty fresh in our minds. So it’s easy to compare the two; but the only comparisons I will make are: Garfield plays a MUCH better Peter Parker than Maguire did. I prefer this origin story, but because it’s slightly truer to the comics but because I felt it was better done.

The Amazing Spiderman follows Peter Parker as an average teen with a confusing past just trying to come to terms with who he is before being “blessed” with super powers. Powers he doesn’t quite know how to handle until the death of his Uncle Ben (Come on that’s not a spoiler is it?) sets him kind of in the right direction. All the while successfully seducing Gwen Stacy. Then comes the tormented bad guy who isn’t really a bad guy.

Fun fact, the makers of The Avengers wanted to include the Oscorp tower into their film, but couldn’t get the rendering done in time for their release.

What Worked:

– The acting! Yep. When you let good actors do their job, they’ll act their asses off for you. Andrew Garfield’s stock continues to rise with me, as he played this well. His Peter Parker is a real teenager, (even if he doesn’t look much like one) He was kind of shy, yet cocky, and awkward. Stone, Sheen and the rest of the gang take a cheesy comic book and an even cheesy script and make it for the lactose intolerant.

– The action! Man those fight scenes were pretty wicked. You had fluid motion without a camera that made you more car sick than the last time your half-blind bus driver dropped you off at high-school. I like how Webb made this Spiderman slightly more clumsy. I mean even if you woke up tomorrow with all that strength and agility, you’d slam into more than one wall too. Eh Tobey?

– The ending. I felt this Spidey flick ended with so many emotions that you are begging for more. With many “what ifs?” and “will they or won’t they?”

What didn’t work:

– The Script! Or at the very least the editing in post production. This flick went all over the place at some points. Their were scenes I was in promotional material that weren’t in this film that should have been to help explain certain nuances of the story and character development.  Now I’ve read a few reviews that say there weren’t as many laugh out loud moments as compared to the other Raimi films. First: Stop comparing. Second: I had a couple good chuckles, but I’ll admit, some of Spidey’s quips were flat.

– Mini-Spoiler: The LIZARDS. There are suddenly a bunch of little lizards roaming around New York City without any explanation nor impact on the story. WTF Webb!?

– The CGI for The Lizard. I feel as though they cut the budget when they got around to animating this big bad guy. Spiderman looks so fantastic and the scenes with him web slinging around NYC look awesome. But when you got this green-bro on screen, it felt like they cut him out of a completely CGI created world with photoshop and pasted him there.

– The third act. This film has a pretty solid opening and run. However just before the third act, the pacing and feel seem to drop off a bit, as if it lost a little interest in itself.

The Lowdown:

This isn’t going to beat The Dark Knight Rises, or The Avengers. This is Spiderman. The Amazing Spiderman. At it’s base, there’s a great story, with an amazingly cool superhero and some damn fine actors. Is this gonna win an Oscar for best film? F–k no! IS this gonna rock your socks? Hell Yeah! This has all the right ingredients for a fun night at the movies. It won’t make your brain hurt with complicated stories or churn your stomach like the last King Kong film. It’ll do what it was meant to do: entertain you for the majority of it’s 136 minutes! PS: Stick around during the credits. Mini-post-film-scene.

The Amazing Spierman is 80% Prime Awesome.